Which side are you on?

One of the most paramount questions that you will ever be asked and in most cases will define your future is. Breast and wing? Or Leg and Thigh?

Chicken is one of the cheapest and most globally accepted meats for consumption for those of us who don’t worship or denounce this animal. I know that there are those of us who in fact worship and/or denounce the drool worthy, finger-licking, going-for-secondsing beautiful animals of the world, but hey that’s your choice, NOT mine! I am indeed an animal lover, but thats another story. I for one, when choosing to dine on this oh so economical clucker, love me some breast. I will indeed go to great lengths and strides to get it. “Oh you serve cut-up chicken only? No worries, excuse me miss, when plating my food, could you please find the breast pieces only....I’m allergic to the leg and thigh, if I eat it I will die.”

Many Jamaicans tend to choose leg and thigh, particularly because it’s cheaper for a restaurant to buy and /or most say it’s more flavourful and the breast piece is dry. This is not so! Who has been cooking your breasts? A breast doesn’t take as long to cook as a thigh, so most people happen to get over-cooked breasts, and it has been said a Jamaican will cook its meat until it is dead.

Personally, I wonder, why eat chicken if you’re not going to eat the breast. It is the meatiest, healthiest, most moist and tastiest part when cooked right! Confession; I don’t even know how to tackle a thigh, where to bite first, how to navigate through the dark, fatty, veiny meat. As a qualified chef, I can debone an entire chicken in less than 10 minutes, leaving it still attached whole, but for the life of me, can I eat a thigh in under the same time? No.

I can list at least 6 reasons from the top of my head why breast is just, better than thigh:

1. It has a higher protein to fat ratio = healthier piece of chicken. 
2. I don’t have to dodge veins. 
3. There are no major obstructing bones. 
4. There is more meat on a breast. Why eat an animal, if not for the meat. 
5. Breast is to the point, thigh is a mystery, and you never know what’s around the corner. 
6. And, just because.

Either way, time and time again, I’ve seen many people lash out because they have not gotten their preferred part of the chicken. It seems to be a serious issue. Have you ever seen a very, very, hungry construction worker throw away his food because it did not include the part of the chicken he wanted? I have seen it! It’s like seeing a Unicorn and Pegasus mate. I have also seen on many occasions as I am sure you have all seen, an infuriated individual carrying back their KFC bag into the premises because “the fucking eediat get my order wrong.” 

There are those of you who will object to my stand against thigh and leg, mostly thigh, and I’m sure you have your reasons, if you are THAT passionate, maybe you need to blog about it.....

Below is one of my favourite chicken breast recipes. Remember, before you cook a chicken, rinse it off with vinegar, lemon or lime juice (rinse after that with water to get rid of a citric “orangey” flavour that may linger even after cooked). This process is quick, easy and reduces the level of pathogens present, especially those that spread the very popular Salmonella virus.

Chicken Parmesan Recipe

Ingredients

Sauce:

• 1/2 large yellow onion
• 1/4 cup olive oil
• 2 medium garlic cloves, peeled and minced
• 1 can (28 oz) crushed tomatoes or tomato sauce
• 1 teaspoon dried oregano
• Pinch of red pepper flakes
• Pinch of sugar

Chicken:

• 4 chicken breast cutlets (1 1/4 to 1 1/2 pounds total)
• Salt to taste
• 2 eggs
• 1 cup breadcrumbs
• 1 ¼ cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
• 1/4 cup olive oil
• 2 Tbsp fresh basil leaves, thinly sliced
• 8 ounces mozzarella cheese, thinly sliced

Method

1 Prepare the sauce. Coarsely grate half of an onion. Grating the onion will create smaller onion pieces and release more of the onion's juices, and is faster than chopping. Heat olive oil in a saucepan on medium-high heat. Add the onions and sauté for 2-3 minutes. Add the minced garlic. Cook until fragrant, about a minute more. Then add the tomatoes, oregano, red pepper flakes, and sugar. Bring to a simmer, reduce the heat to maintain the simmer. Cook, uncovered while you prepare the chicken (about 10-12 minutes).

2 Preheat oven to 400°F. Working one at a time, place a chicken cutlet between two layers of wax paper (or plastic wrap). With a meat pounder, pound the chicken pieces to flatten them to an even thickness - between 1/4 - 1/2 inch. (If you don't have a meat pounder, you can use a rubber mallet, an empty wine bottle, or a heavy rolling pin.) Salt the chicken pieces well.

3 In a shallow bowl (large enough to dredge the cutlets), mix together the breadcrumbs, 1/2 cup of the Parmesan, and pinch of salt. In separate shallow bowl, whisk together the eggs.

4 Heat 1/4 cup of olive oil in a large sauté pan on medium-high heat. The oil should be shimmering, not smoking. Dredge the chicken pieces 1 piece at a time first in the egg mixture, then in the breadcrumbs. Then lay the pieces in the hot sauté pan. Turn the heat to medium, then gently fry the cutlets until they are golden brown, about 3-4 minutes per side. 

5 Spread enough tomato sauce to thickly coat the bottom of 9x13 casserole pan or baking dish. Once the cutlets are browned on both sides, arrange them on top of the tomato sauce in the baking dish. Place sauce over each of the cutlets. Sprinkle the tops with sliced basil. Then top the cutlets with slices of mozzarella and the remaining Parmesan cheese.

6 Bake in the oven for 10-12 minutes, or until the mozzarella begins to brown.

Serve with spaghetti and the remaining sauce, or in a large roll. If at this point you want to redeem yourself after slabbing on all the cheese and scrumptious goodness, use wheat spaghetti or wheat rolls. (Serves 4)

Happy Eating!

ahhhhh.......F#%K IT!

You’re just leaving a club or party at the wee hours of the morn and there's ONE thing on your mind….well, maybe two things, however, I'm talking about FOOD here people, and if you’re like me you are already trying to run through a list of all the places open.

 In Jamaica, especially Kingston you can perhaps list a handful of places serving food at the stomach raping 4:30 am. While some of us are off to our night restaurants; Burger King, KFC, Chelsea, Island Grill, 'Night Spot' among others, there are those of us who are off to the preferred pan chicken man on the side of the road. But before you start digging in and licking your fingers, have you ever stopped to think, where does this man wash his hands? or how does he keep his area sanitary? Does he even have running water? or a designated area for garbage solely? What from Narnia's closet is under his nails? There are quite a few health risks those of us who choose to dine from street side vendors are faced with.

It is very important to have a strong immune system simply for health survival purposes. For the "obsessively compulsive germaphobes" here are a few pointers one could check-out-when-eating-out:

• The overall LOOK, FEEL, and SMELL of the place…if it doesn’t seem right….it more ‘n likely isn’t, trust your gut before your gut never trusts you again.

• If a ball of hay rolls pass before you dine and the place seems rather deserted, no you have not discovered the IT spot to eat at before everyone else....get out and get out quickly. If barely anyone dines at this restaurant, and its BEEN open for business, there's usually a reason.  

• Having worked in the hospitality and food service industry for quite a few years, I always wipe my cutlery before use…take it from me, this may be a habit you’d wanna get into. NO restaurant is exempt, 5 star to no star.

• Ideally, running water should be available wherever you decide to eat from. People must be able to wash their hands…..with soap. This is ONE of the most important things you have to do in LIFE! There have been many diseases and viruses linked to the non washing of hands throughout history and presently.  I am not a firm believer in the overly hygienic “anti-bacterial gel/wipe” trend, unless there is absolutely no way for me to wash my hands at the moment. Why you ask? The extensive use of anti-bacterials in this day and age have been proven to cause “SUPER” bacteria….I don’t need to help in the development of any bacteria stronger than what my immune system can barely manage.  Am I preaching? AMEN

• Try to not sit too close to the restroom, I don’t need to spell out why right? See no evil, hear no evil…. smell no evil? Best to sit where your experience will be most pleasant and hygienic.

Either way, after drunkenly arguing with the pan chicken man; why I couldn’t get another slice of bread or when since a ¼ of chicken cost that or why he only has pineapple soda and no pepsi to sell me, I’ve finally acquired my meal.  Taking a relatively quick glance around at the slew of men fully enthralled in what seems to be THE conversation of the minute OVER the chicken on the flame, a few dogs (literally) chilling out a couple feet away, I take a look at my beautifully wrapped in foil chicken present and think….ahhh fuck it and I devour away. What doesn’t kill me will make me stronger…..I hope.